all I wanted was spiritual liberation, and I felt so drawn to him via his YouTube videos. naturally I saved and spent a month at his sanctuary in Costa Rica.
One of his disciples entreated me to a private dinner on the second night. I just felt so... comfortable, and his smile was so gorgeous and desirable. after dinner, I moved to sit next to him -- and he noticed my erection through my pants. ... we had a very good time together.
the next day he approached me with good news that I was invited, with him, to spend the day with shunyamurti. I was so humbled and excited.
I had no idea things could go so wrong. he is in his SEVENTIES. But still, he asked me if I had ever explored the realms of tantric sex with a master.
you can guess what this led to. the three of us had gay sex for the better part of the afternoon. usually I would be fine, but afterwards for the rest of the retreat, shunyamurti acted like I didn't even exist. ... i felt so used and thrown away, it broke my heart to pieces. the things I did for him, to make him happy...
anyways even despite being treated like sex doll trash, the retreat itself was a bust and super boring. There certainly was no Enlightenment to be had (I felt so terrible.)
let me know if you need anything else. of course I left out the juicy details, but I can be more explicit if you think that's helpful