The writer of this testimonial has requested to remain anonymous for the time being.
"I started having difficulties trusting myself and my inner knowing. Everything had to be sieved through the Sat Yoga filter created by Shunyamurti"
The Truth Will Set You Free.
The 'Sat' in Sat Yoga is Sanskrit for 'truth'. Most people I met at Sat Yoga at the time were seeking truth, simply said, the truth about life. Good, sweet, loving and kind people with pure intentions, intelligent, but also searching. That was our soft spot.
When I was asked to write my experience for this website, I hesitated at first.
After all, Sat Yoga gave us so many good things. Set in tropical Costa Rica, it provided a place that promised seekers to find answers. They were generous with information, inspiration, intellectual insights about life and oneself. Complemented with courses, creativity, and of course spiritually approved entertainment. There was always an atmosphere of 'love and light’ with the most sweet, welcoming, and warm people, some of whom became friends for which I am grateful to this day. In a way, it had the perfect ingredients to make it feel like paradise, just like the meals that Shunyamurti's wife would cook. I personally felt as though I had found a home away from home at the time. With a second family included.
The problem was... it wasn't family and Sat Yoga didn't want to be second in our lives.
Slowly realisations started to sink in that I couldn't deny anymore. Especially after my presence at Sat Yoga was restricted for a while, when I chose to follow an outside course. I heard from a friend who was still at Sat Yoga that Shunyamurti was telling a totally different story about my reason for leaving. My eyes were beginning to open. I remembered the times when I had wanted to visit my family abroad and was strongly warned by Shunyamurti. The constant reminders of how the world as we know it would end... most probably around 2012. The ashram would be fully self-sustainable and a spiritual refuge. In hindsight, it was a selfish way of living. Spiritually caring about the world as a whole, while our closest family and friends should be seen as threats to our growth process.
At last, I left, and a long journey of unlearning began. Freeing myself from a mindset that had been molded by manipulation, as I had never wanted to call it, but unfortunately it was. I had slowly let myself get seduced by spiritual knowledge, a sense of belonging and so much more, to a point where I started having difficulties trusting myself and my inner knowing. Everything had to be sieved through the Sat Yoga filter created by Shunyamurti.
Leaving Sat Yoga felt like a loss at first. I truly missed the people that had found their way into my heart. I also felt as if I had failed or betrayed the loving people in this community. In their eyes I probably had. But eventually I experienced an increasing relief and started walking my path in life again. This path ended up leading me to Christian faith. An unlikely place for a spiritual seeker finally find, but it turned out be the truth that I had searched for all along.
So spiritually speaking, my story has a happy ending, an ongoing one, but back then my heart needed a long time to mend. I had left Sat Yoga, but Sat Yoga still had to leave my system.
And that's what made me decide to write my experience for this website after all. If, at the time, I would have had access to these types of stories sent in by former Sat Yogis (I actually remember googling ‘Sat Yoga’ at times- occasionally accompanied by the word 'cult') I might have left earlier and with less inner scratches and slow-healing scars. And so, if you are currently at Sat Yoga and you have an inner inkling that something might be off, I truly hope that you will listen to it.
‘The truth will set you free’, it says in the Bible, and I truly pray that these stories will give you confirmation of your inner knowing as well as the courage and confidence necessary to reach out and step out. I wish you only and all the very best.